Anonymous Mess

Our numbers are worse. It seems like I simply don't understand the point of this enterprise, doesn't it? The debt is supposed to go down, not up. I've attempted to post figures several times over the last six weeks, but the hits just keep coming. In addition to the Great Mold Adventure of May, we've incurred the following -- We had two, possibly three, computers pass away in the last two months; I'm using my laptop in place of my desktop PC, and Spouse will be giving our media server intensive care before calling for last rites, but my elderly aunt needed a durable tablet, tout de suite , to replace her defunct device. (Elderly Aunt is on the most fixed of fixed incomes, dealing with a journal's worth of medical issues for herself and dementia-diagnosis Uncle, and has no one else with resources: our assistance to her is non-negotiable.) This expense is on an interest-free* credit card, but is nonetheless an additional expense.  Spouse's phone d...

I just spent $640 on a new monitor. Not this one precisely, but you get the idea Cue PF Frugality alarms: Alert! Alert! Unplanned purchase! Funds diverted from debts still outstanding! Activate guilt shields! Criticism incoming! Yeah, I'm cowering. I know, I know. Why spend $640 that you (broadly speaking) don't have when you do have a functional, if aging, monitor and you're trying to get out of debt? Because unfortunately, "functional" isn't quite good enough. I work from home roughly once a week, and Spouse uses my monitor when on call at the new job. At work, we both have dual, (reasonably) high-res monitors, because our employers understand our workflow has us moving between applications throughout the day.  To illustrate, in my usual work at the current client, I am checking/have open at a minimum: Specification documentation, usually Excel or Word An integrated development environment app, mostly for the display aspects of my work ...

Yes, you, you peach-skinned cherub   So, the last five years have been... fraught, perhaps? Intermittently dreadful, oh yes. With periodic showers of crap. Generally, double-plus ungood.  Not that the long chain of years before these last five were a sunny smiling "before" picture.  I am the very model of a middle-class neurotic: chronically, clinically depressed and anxious. (I don't want to overstate this. None of it has been extreme enough to require hospitalization, for example. But it has been absolutely bad enough to make me feel like every cell in my body is bruised and knocked askew, like I'm dragging myself through a swamp with my legs encased in concrete. Just bad enough to make me feel hopeless and joyless and sleep 15 hours a day. So yes, many, many people are far worse off than I, but this is more than bad enough for me.) But recently I had a sense -- a hope  -- well, maybe it was a fantasy -- that I was reaching a new equili...

Sigh. Yay, we don't need to replace the roof? Still: Miscellaneous repairs and refurbishments - $2,355 Exterminator - $70 Commission for finding new tenants - $2,038 Mold inspection - $350 Mold remediation + installation of mold-repelling superpowers -    $2,553 Tree removal - $550 Grand total -    $7,916 Amount available on-hand - ~ $4,500 Result: another $3,275 from the line of credit . Sigh. [Edited to add tree removal. Did I mention Sigh? ]

Our rental property continues to physically embody the reasons why people don't make money off of rental properties. Checklist for the last two months: Tenants not renewing  Downed branches (and possibly damaged tree) from windstorms need removal Possible leak in attic Probable mold in attic The management fee for finding/renting to a new tenant is much heftier, of course -- roughly equivalent to a month's rent. And of course that's in addition to costs from the usual refurbishing when putting a rental back on market: painting, deep cleaning, replacing anything that has aged out since the lease began (in our case, that includes at least a mailbox). Let's call that $1,500, though I honestly have no idea. No word yet on what the branch/possible tree removal will cost. Crossing my fingers that the tree is okay. The state requires a certified inspector to determine the presence of mold. (This costs us money but I approve of it. Mold can have a huge health impac...

Scary, scary numbers Okay, since I'm typing into a void here, I'm less concerned about posting numbers. Speaking them unto the universe, as it were. They're not good. As in six figures of not-good.  Yup. And now, without further waffling, the trauma and the tragedy: $104,966.38 . Yeah. Here's the breakdown: Creditor Interest Rate Owed Amazon Store 26.49% -31.99 Chase Visa 21.49% -123.38 Chase Amazon Prime 18.99% -127.30 Chase Slate 13.74% -420.18 Chase Freedom 12.74% -103.56 CU Signature Visa 2 10.49% 0.00 Bank A Signature Visa 10.40% -262.17 CU Signature Visa 1 8.40% -13,210.51 HELOC 7.50% -85,344.58 CreditFirst (Firestone) 0.00% -785.80 Citi Diamond Preferred 0.00% -2,055.43 BankAmericard Platinum 0.00% -2,501.48 Total CC Debt -19,621.80 ...

Spouse got a job, a gen-u-wine, paycheck-generatin', benefits-havin', full-bloody-damn-time job! With a salary nearly equal to the previous, City-based position! Win win win for the Spouse! It starts in a few weeks. And then joy will spread across the countryside like melted butter, dripping into every crevice, as we start to beat our debts over their filthy heads with the valorous shovels of income and frugality! Yes, I'm giddy.

I suppose I should be grateful not to be losing ground, and even to be able to run, but I so want to move forward. I'm relieved we haven't gone further into debt since our job losses -- well, not since the fall, anyway -- but the inability to make progress frets me daily, even hourly. I need movement, not just running in place. My new consulting gig is going well, I think; at any rate, they haven't seemed particularly shocked by my ignorance, nor dismayed by my slowness. I believe my performance may be better than adequate, but I'm not feeling like it yet. Fingers crossed. Fingers crossed, too, for Spouse, who's had two phone interviews and one in-person interview with an employer about an hour away. All went well (the recruiter's verdict: "It's your to lose"), but now we're waiting for a decision. The company allows -- even encourages -- telecommuting, so the actual commute wouldn't be daily, lessening its impact. On the other hand, ...

Random Subset of Reasons Why Job Hunting Is Like Dating, and Therefore A Super Shitty Part of Adulthood Reason #1: I hate hate hate it. Seriously, why don't I just uncap my marker here and write "JUDGE ME YOU TOTAL STRANGER" across my forehead? Reason #9: Interview/date clothes. They are a lie, a lie that you wear, and also overpay for, and then worry about snagging/ripping/staining or otherwise knocking them off their pedestal of interview-and-date-worthiness. A pox on them. Reason #11: Unbearable self-consciousness. As an alpha-introvert, barely bearable self-consciousness is my default state when in a room with any stranger, so why not turn that up to 11? Reason #12: They will make nice, and chatter about where they like to lunch and the latest project they're working on, and tell you how interesting your story is, and you'll think, hey, maybe this isn't so bad/could actually work. They'll smile and promise to get back to you before next Wednesd...

Spouse's former company will cease to exist next month, and with it our COBRA. (No company = no plan = no self-funded part of plan.) Have I mentioned that medical insurance is insane, y'all? I have? Was I the first? Because, y'all. It's insane. Since this counts as an eligible life-event, we can sign up for coverage under the ACA. We technically have 60 days from the date of the life-event, but who wants to be uninsured for that length of time?  And who wants to continue to pay against a deductible that's not going to be applicable in 30-90 days? Because insurance is a Big Freaking Adult Deal with a Big Freaking Adult Price Tag, I am Freaking the Adult Out. Seriously. Woke up before 3 a.m. Saturday and decided I had to at least start the research; spent seven hours online, creating and populating an Excel workbook to compare up to five plans. Took a break for a sandwich and a shower at about 10 a.m. and then spent another four hours refining the spreadsheet an...

I could've sworn I left it right here .... It was a bit of a blur, between interviews and getting a new contract (yay! paycheck for a year!), trying to gather tax information (why did I schedule tax appointment for February 1?), and several new bills and obligations (boo...hiss... sigh). The contract is with a large employer in our city, and is located close to home -- I could take the bus if necessary.  The work is... a stretch. I'm having to use long-abandoned skills, and learn new ones, and while the client seems satisfied at two weeks in, I have moments and sometimes days of abject terror, wondering if I'll ever navigate my way through and get up to speed. This is only my second contract, and a major client of my agency, so I really feel pressure to not just do good, timely work, but to impress, maybe to wow.  Spouse maintains I'm my own worst enemy, none of it is beyond me, etc., etc. I have noted, however, that Spouse does not suffer from measured, bal...